Loneliness is not whether you are alone and there’s no one around you.
Sometimes…
You could be in a room full of people and you could be feeling so lonely. Other times you could be lying in bed next to somebody that loves you, who’s amazing and you could feel really lonely as well.
So at the end of the day, we need to identify that loneliness is not just about being alone.
So number one way to alleviate to come out loneliness is to identify the reason or cause. Try to identify the reason why you are feeling lonely.
Is that because it could be depression, it could be that you’re getting over the loss, it could be a loss of a job, it could be that you don’t have enough hobbies, or routine in your life? And you are just lying in bed all day not doing anything and eating junk food.
First identify the reason and cause. What is the cause of your loneliness? Is it loneliness or is it isolation? And identify those two.
Isolation; this is something I see so often, it’s so important.
Please don’t settle in relationships because 'You are lonely'.
So many times I see people getting married, in ten-year relationships, they are lonely because they feel that this is going to solve all loneliness problems but at the end of the day, it is actually going to make you feel more lonely. It is going to trigger you feel more lonely. Especially when you are with the wrong person, and yes, in the beginning, it could be all nice and you.
Could feel loved? and you feel like having relationship is going to help you to come out of loneliness, but when the honeymoon period is over, your loneliness is going to come back, it is going to come back!!!
Sometimes the cause for looniness may be 'only the person in your circle' or 'you are the only vegan/vegetarian in your circle' or 'you are the only entrepreneur' or 'even the only artist', in your circle you are going to feel lonely.
I know because, I am a vegan and if I didn't have vegan people around me and sometimes I felt isolated from vegans I felt lonely, I felt like no one understand or the pain that I felt for animals so when I got together with vegans and I started to vent or even join communities, I may feel that I am belonged somewhere.
Now find your tribe, also find your hobbies, interests and take up new hobbies.
If you want to do salsa or dancing. You want to go surfing and you want to go traveling, take bath in sea or river or falls. 'Do those'.
Don’t just sit wasting your time away feeling lonely get up and do something about it.
The real important note:
But work on your personal development, so read a lot of books, understand about self-awareness, brain, understand about emotional intelligence, understand about mindset, videos to be watched to get motivated. Talks they do help a lot, yeah they could help you for the moment, but the more you read, the more you understand, the more you understand about yourself, if you are self-aware and understand your triggers for your loneliness or your depressions or whatever it is, the earlier it is for you to be able to deal with that loneliness as well and have the right tools, to be able to deal with it.
Do 'Meditation and Pranayama'- The regulation of the breath through certain techniques and exercises. These two techniques does miraculous changes in your thought level and physical too.
Write journal
So whatever you are feeling, you are feeling upset, depressed or whatever, write a journal or your thoughts or even talk to a friend, but writing a journal is great and have a gratitude list like every day and night. I did this for six months, I did a gratitude. I felt amazing. I felt like my life, even though probably didn’t have much or you know other people had better lives, but I felt like my life was amazing. I felt like I was on top of the world.
Embrace time being alone. Be enthusiastic. Embrace that time become your own best friend now you are born alone and you are going to die alone. You might get married, you might have children, but at the end of the day your children are going to leave you, your spouse one of you is going to be unfortunately passed away or sometimes you might get diseases, they might walk out. You have friends that are going to betray as well. So at the end of the day you are your own. Best friend so say to yourself hey you know 'Your Name and Your Being' I want to hang out with you tonight and we are going to drink some wine have the best time ever.
Talk to yourself. Have a funny conversation with yourself because most of the time people have really depressing conversation with themselves. They talk down to themselves, and would you talk like depressed talk to your best friend? 'No know'.
Would you call you some of the things that you say to yourself every day? Would you talk like that to someone that you respect? So starts becoming your own best friend have good self talk with you best friend enjoy the company of your best friend. Have good thoughts, feelings, emotions and practice your inner chat with positive words.
I myself have traveled alone all around the part of country. I went to many parts of country, I dint know a single soul. I didn’t know the native language at times, I didn’t know anyone. I go to the cinemas alone. I go to the beach alone. I am not saying that its important to have friends and have a community and I said find your tribe, at the same time no one’s going to come and save you. You need to save yourself.
Have a
Be cheerful.
